Past Self

By Meghan R

If we could talk to our past self

what would we say

would we listen or tell

would we shelter or leave defenseless

is it protection or denial

all the yelling hiding

running away

if we could talk to our past self

would they believe

the words we told them

would they want the truth

that the struggle doesn’t just vanish

that there isn’t always a fairytale ending

if we could talk to our past self

do you think you would sugarcoat reality

like the powdered doughnut we relished

would you tell them that smiles and laughter

will lead them forever

would you whisper

with cracks of guilt

that life is as simple as the yellow brick road

if we could talk to our past self

would they notice the mist in our eyes

while they talk about the movie

and waiting for their Prince charming

if I could talk to my past self

I would sit her down

hold her tight

look into her deep blue eyes

and say I’m sorry

because I can’t lie to her

I can’t compare her life to that fairytale

or promise her the yellow brick road

if I could talk to my past self

I would apologize for the dreams

that were lost

for the years of hope doomed

from the start if I could talk to my past self

I would give her that powdered doughnut

because it’s not her fault

I failed her.